Being Sick Without Being Taken Care Of

There is a special kind of misery that comes with being sick while life keeps demanding that you show up.

The stomach bugs are relentless.
The flu is making its rounds.

Raizy's body was weak, achy, foggy, nauseous, and somehow still expected to function. The kids still needed rides, meals, help with homework, and bedtime.

All Raizy wanted was to be pampered.
To be doted on.
For her husband to notice she wasn’t okay and say, “Go lie down. I’ve got this.”

Instead, the house still needed running. The kids still needed her.

And her husband, who wasn’t feeling great himself, didn’t suddenly step into the nurturing role she was craving.

And that hurt.

What it was like before

Raizy felt physically miserable and emotionally raw. Every small task felt heavy. Managing responsibilities while fighting the flu felt unfair and overwhelming. She noticed the quiet resentment building: If he really cared, he’d take over. He’d pamper me. I wouldn’t have to ask.

She felt unseen and guilty for feeling that way.

What happened

Instead of pushing through or silently waiting for him to read her mind and rescue her, Raizy practiced one of the most misunderstood skills for a great marriage: Self-Care.

Not “when I feel better” self-care.
Not spa-day self-care.
But tiny, nurturing acts she could do even while sick.

She stopped asking, Why isn’t anyone taking care of me?
And started asking, How can I take care of myself right now? What would feel comforting right now?

Here’s what self-care actually looked like for Raizy:

• Rubbing lotion into her hands and feet

• Sitting with a warm drink 

• Calling or texting a friend just to feel connected

• Reading a few pages of a light book 

• Taking a hot shower or bath

• Lying down for 20 minutes without explaining herself

• Letting meals be simple, repetitive, or ordered in

• Stating one clear desire: “I'd love help with bedtime tonight.”

Nothing dramatic.
Nothing fancy.
Just small ways of saying, I matter too.

She treated herself the way she wished someone else would.

What it’s like now

Once Raizy stopped abandoning herself, the edge softened.

She wasn’t as irritable.
She wasn’t keeping score.
She felt calmer even while still sick.

And without the pressure and resentment in the air, her husband naturally stepped in more. Not perfectly. Not with fanfare. But enough for her to feel less alone.

Self-care didn’t cure the flu.
But it changed how lonely and heavy it felt.

Wanting to be pampered when you’re sick doesn’t make you needy.
It makes you human.

Self-care is how you meet that need without resentment and without waiting for someone else to read your mind.

Are you exhausted from pushing through?
Do you want to feel more cared for?
Are you ready to stop waiting and start nurturing yourself?

If so, let’s get you the support you need.

👉 Schedule a free call with me here
You deserve care even (and especially) when you’re sick.